It’s not all about money, honey

Many a time, money is one of the reasons why a couple falls out and a perfectly good marriage hits the rocks. Here’s some of the most common reasons people squabble over cash.

Neglect

Sometimes, everything is not what it seems and arguments about money are not really arguments about money but instead an indication of neglect and a basic lack of attention and care for the marriage itself rather than the money itself. Bringing up money issues or splurging cash is a way to paper over deeper issues and it is key that you understand the root cause of the quarrel and address it, be it monetary or emotional.

Obscured reality

Have you ever wondered why money is never an issue at the beginning of a relationship? The honeymoon period of a relationship is one in which nothing can go wrong but as reality catches up to the couple and the heady buzz of new found love starts to fade away, little things like living expenses, loans and running a house become more paramount. Perhaps it would be prudent to hire someone more adept at managing finances than yourself if you find budgeting and managing money more than you can handle.

Unequal incomes

Among males, earning money is deeply tied with a man’s sense of self-worth and it can be immensely emasculating to find that the woman in the relationship is the breadwinner in a dual-income family. Today’s families challenge the traditional roles of spouses, and ego issues could crop up due to this disparity in income. Wives might end up feeling guilty about one thing or another and husbands feel like they’re not the men they are. Set limit so that both partners feel valued with equal spending rights and all will be well.

The rat race

Ours is a world of the rat race and it becomes very easy for one partner to get caught up in the spending frenzy of the other and spend beyond their means. This is a walking debt trap and you must be careful not to fall for it as it will impact your union in a significant manner. The only way to deal with this is just be honest with your better half and work at eliminating these insecurities.

Not enough communication

When you see money leaking out of an account with not enough accountability for the money trail, it can spark discord. The key is to be honest and not tackle this with ego and anger but with a sense of clarity. What broke down? Has there been an increase in spending on the household or has something unexpected cropped up? Discuss things as a team and you’ll be amazed how easily things can work out when you have two heads on the job.

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